Cheering for Mom

Ever since Lillian was born, I've talked to her as if she were a friend in the room and understood everything that I was saying. I also cheered for myself every time I did something remotely interesting to keep me going on some of the harder days as a mom. 

The other day, I woke up and Lillian stood by my bed and cheered that I was awake, "Yay!" 

I changed her diaper and she cheered that I did that, "Yay!"

When I made breakfast she said, "Wow, wow, wow!"

And so on and so on.

Let's just say, we've raised her right.

Also, it's nice to get some thanks here and there.

I don't care what you do or where you are, but cheer someone on today. And, not just your favorite sport team.

It may be exactly what they need to get them through the day. To encourage them to be the best that they can be.

We all need a little cheering on at one point or another and it's contagious! 

Holy House Cleaning

Every once and a while, it's important for us to take a minute to evaluate our lives and do some holy house keeping.

Am I truly loving people around me? Am I serving those in need? Am I letting my emotions get the best of me instead of pursuing a life of progressive integrity? 

Here are some things that I'm doing to work out some of the emotional gunk that is holding me back from being the person that I would like to be:

Stop, pray, and speak positive truths. Life does not go as planned. That is a truth. We all experience suffering and hurt in one way or another, but it's how we respond and choose to deal with these things that leads us to either freedom or spiritual bondage.

We need to stop and pray for God to give us the power to forgive those that hurt us. Not forgiving them is keeping us in a cycle of hatred that is not hurting them, but hurting ourselves. 

We need to step up our attitude of gratitude because while things around us change, God does not change. He wants the best for us. He wants to give us all of the love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control to get through what life throws at us. 

But, we have to ask for it each day. 

And the Bible says that God will give these things to us if we just ask for it. To truly become people that live our lives in love.

Plan. If you can predict times that are particularly stressful for you, sit and create a language for those times so that anger and anxiety does not overwhelm you. 

If people keep telling you how you should be doing something that you are not currently doing or talking negatively about your life and you are bothered by it. Create a sentence to say to calm you down and stop the conversation. "Thank you for your advice, I will strongly consider it and appreciate your concern."

If you get overwhelmed by the amount of work that you have to do say, "One thing at a time, I can do this with God's help!"

Reverse the negative. To every negative statement there is a positive statement.

"I'm a horrible cook" to "I am a Ramen expert."

"I can't do anything right" to "We all have different talents and I am thankful for the ones that I have been given."

God wants to clean out our hearts on a regular basis. The Bible talks in Malachi about how God's love is a refining fire. Throughout our life, we go through cycles of purging out the bad stuff and putting in the good.

Who's with me on this journey? 

Cleaning, Tigers & Bears, Oh My!

Chores. That's what they are - a chore. I have gone back and forth about my opinion about having a clean house versus spending the extra time with my daughter. 

There is guilt involved either way. You either feel like you are missing out on the extra time with your child or missing out on a utensil clean enough to eat your food with. 

There has been such a tug on my heart to spend time with my daughter and let the chores go to the wayside. But, I'm starting to change my opinion regarding how I prioritize taking care of the home.

It hit me one day that it is really important for my girl to have an example of her parents sacrificing to make sure that our home (living and work space) is organized and clean. She needs to see us taking responsibility of our things because it will hopefully teach her to take responsibility of her own things when the time comes.

I would clearly rather play with her, and she knows that, so I usually make cleaning a game for her. So that she can help in some way. It typically distracts her for five minutes and then she makes a mess in another part of the house.

I've found that, just like anything, a healthy balance is needed in this area. I can not prioritize cleaning over everything else in my life. But at the same time, I need to know that scrubbing the floor and putting away laundry is a good example, and helpful to my husband and myself to have a fresh space to live in. 

As a part of the balance, I have chosen to wait to clean up her toys (with her) until the end of the day. Otherwise, I would be picking up things constantly. My husband has taken over dish duty, so that I can do laundry, cook, and focus on the rest of the house. 

Even just 30 minutes a day makes all the difference in keeping our house cozy and comfortable for us to live in. Do you find that it's hard to make cleaning a priority when life gets busy? 

Now let's see if we can keep this up when baby 2 comes 😂 (clearly a joke). I'll have to write another blog post on the topic when the time comes!

Enjoy them now, time flies! Yuck.

It's been a while since I last posted! Things are definitely busier as a new Mom. You know, the whole trying to keep a human alive 24-7 thing? Yeah, that!

Something that people keep telling me, since an hour after our sweet Lillian was born has been, "Enjoy it while you can! This stage goes by so fast. She'll be grown up before you know it." Now it is not the sentiment that bothers me, it is the implication and the consistent tone that people use when saying this on a regular basis (literally every day). A judgmental, negative, tone. Like they might as well be saying, "Kids grow up to be annoying human beings and I never appreciated the time I had with my kids as babies, so you probably won't either." 

To me, being a parent only gets better with time. I'm not sure how it was for other moms, but in my experience and in the experience of my other friends, you are filled with a deep connection, but not necessarily filled with a rush of unconditional love the second your kid is born. It kind of feels like someone hands you someone else's kid and says, "Good luck!" Just like any other relationship, this one takes time to nurture and grow and everyday and every minute you love the child more and more. Just like, everyday you love your spouse more, because your relationship grows if you really want it to. But it takes hard work! 

People will always look back on life and wish that they appreciated it in some ways more than others, but that is in every case, not just in the case of parenting. I will be nastalgic when she goes from stage to stage, but I don't need someone making me feel self-conscious about how I may or may not spend my time.

Every day, being a Mom gets better and better. Seeing her grow does not bring me sadness, it brings me great joy. When I pack away her small clothes, I feel a sense of pride in her development. Singing, laughing, cooing, rolling over, sitting up, talking, walking, having a conversation, these are all things that I'm so excited about. 

I can not wait to continue to rediscover the world through her eyes and rediscover God through her progression as an independent thinking being. 

So people, I think we should collectively choose to give encouragement to new moms whenever we can. Replace this common phrase with, "Enjoy this amazing stage that your child is in, but let me tell you, it just gets better and better." 

Instead of saying, "Your child is getting so big," with a frown or a tear, say it with a smile. 

Take out the negativity associated with time moving forward, and replace it with hope because that is what will inspire a new parent in the middle of the night when we are up for the 3rd time. That we have so many hard, but also so many great things ahead!

Cute!

Beach days

Sleeping angel